PERSONALITY ANALYSIS TYPES OBSERVED IN GLASGOW PUBLIC CONVENIENCES

EXCITABLE TYPE.
His shorts are twisted, he cannot find the hole, and he rips his pants in anger.

SOCIABLE TYPE.
Joins friends in a piss, if he needs one or not, says it costs nothing.

TIMID TYPE. Cannot piss if anyone is looking. Pretends he has and sneaks back later.

INDIFFERENT TYPE.
All urinals being occupied, he pisses in the sink.

CLEVER TYPE.
Pisses without holding his tool, shows off by adjusting his tie at the same time.

NOSEY TYPE.
Whistles loudly, peeps over to look at the next bloke’s tool.

FRIVOLOUS TYPE.
Plays streams up and across, tries to piss on flies.

ABSENT MINDED TYPE.
Opens his waistcoat, takes out his tie and pisses in his pants.

WORRIED TYPE.
Not quite sure what he has been up to lately, makes close inspection of tool while pissing.

DISGRUNTLED TYPE.
Stands for a while, grunts, farts, tries to piss, fails, farts again and walks out.

PERSONALITY TYPE.
Tells jokes while pissing, shakes off drops with a flourish.

SNEAKY TYPE.
Drops a silent fart while pissing, sniffs and looks at the bloke next to him.

SLOPPY TYPE.
Pisses down his trousers and on his shoes, walks out with flies undone and adjusts balls five minutes later outside.

CHILDISH TYPE.
Looks down at urinal to watch the bubbles.

STRONG TYPE.
Bangs tool on side of urinal when finished, to knock off the drops.

TO WHICH GROUP DO YOU BELONG…BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF.